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Question : Nishant Thiruvalla, India M/35 7th August 2009
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Question : Meeradevi Palanisamy India F/-- 7th August, 2009
Dear Guruji,
Please accept my namaskarams.Bless me with your grace.Guruji ! hope you are in good health.Ji! I have a very noble swami as my guru:he looked after me well as long as I was with him:after certain period I left him to join my family.Even now every month we use to visit him.He receives me well and blesses but still he keeps me in a state of uncertainity and fear which I never felt when I was with him. Every time my brother used to complain to him about my impatience and angry mood. Guruji, I just want to know if I am a sinner whose basic negative charecter can't be changed forever inspite of getting under the watch of a guru? Or my guru expects something which I didn't understand? But I know very well that he is not of that type as I tried it many times.He refused to get any capital benifit from me,neither he is interested in keeping me under his custudy too long.Why guruji, Iam unable to attain the blissful state for which I sacrifised my whole life? Can you guide me to get closer to my guruji to get the blessings to become a real sanyasin as Saratha Mathaji? I am fed up of this worldly life which simply frightens me.Bless me guruji with lots of hope and good and noble thoughts.
Thank you guruji,
With regards,
meera